smile cry angry stress crazy

now every day i feel so lost , my spirit is so empty !_! . i cant find some thing that really can fulfill my loneliness . i dont even know what to do to make my self feel happy any more , actually i feel so sorry for her lo...... i think i do bring tons of unhappiness to her and tons of pressure to her last time .

i feel like i am the father more than friend , when thing become saturated it will turn bad just like care and love . too much will be problematic and "FAN" good choose had been make .

i think i more suitable as single !!! at least not need to worry so much for other , drunk or not drunk safety late d........ this and that not more in my list. and i also not need to do the thing that i dont like as well, maybe think back some sweet memory do feel better but now not any more ............ first thing i go back johor is clean my wall ! take out all the picture and bed sheet as well.

!_! i think i am the champion of drooping tear d........... heheehehehe . definitely can drop it within 30sec .


some time i tell my self what so big deal ? tons of air stewardess in the future why in the hurry ? but another way i look at the couple in my church mostly all married d..... and can see they life style is so healthy i feel so jealous how come a relationship can stand for 7 to 8 year so clean and steady ? they answer will always be the same THANK GOD . hai............................ i think my head enter water d..... always do thing without thinking after do than regret !_! . feel so silly !!!!


i dont how my sister go through so many relationship , keep up up down down ! but now i think she do make a right choose d. and also because of that i afraid d....... my out look look fine but actually the inner part of my heart already become piece by piece like the glass falling down . now you call me purposely go to take care some 1 i dont think i can do it d.......... because i am that type of people that hope that the same treatment will be return but mostly if different from wht i want .