the thinking during flying..........

just now when i fly , i start the engine after buzy with the check . i moody till forget to on the fuel selected then for sure the engine shut down on the spot . i cant imaging that if during take off this type of thing happen i think today will be the last flight d la.......... because for sure will crash on the runway d............. still i have to continue the training i relight te engine and request taxy yo holding point B . than during that the tower hold me at the holding point due to 3 airliner coming to land. ok i also hold at there may be not thing to do, i start thinking of her . i feel very sorry to her , actually yesterday i call her is to let her know that even how also you can always call and come back to me i will be your support but in the end i screw it up. i hate y self , i always say dont want to care her any more but i cant really do it i dont know why i just cant release her .after thinking that my tear almost fall down d....... because i feel so stress the exam is on wednesday. for me i really cant help her much d... who am i ? what can i do ? what can i do can make the family better ?

last time i always scold her , when she go clubbing if not scold i also will feel unhappy ! because i know that place all is fake no real love or what people go there may be lonely and wish some 1 company her for a night after " exercise" can dont even remember each other any more . but i feel very sorry that , i never put my self on her shoes........ i never get her pain and stress too...... now , only i know why love shopping so much , first is can company the mother as well 2 is can spent more the father money and try to get the attention of the father . sad case , i not beside her all the time what she having now i dont say is bad friend , just they thinking and moral value is different because she got 1 friend already stay together with the boyfriend as well . dont be silly to think that they never having sex during this period of time la..........may be for normal people is ok what they are couple what stay together , sure can having sex la.... what wrong with you ? so out 1 ah....... but just my thinking is if my daughter staying with other guy just like that . i dont know what reaction i will have d....

i afraid that she will become bad and la la mui......... what also never mind , clubbing every night drunk and try to get happiness from that type of place . worst come to worst i night stand also never mind =_= as long feel happy than enough d........ even just a day of happy . i dont want an angel become the dark angel. my heart is pain an worry , i always pray and cry i please god dont dont dont make her become that . i know when she starting the clubbing life her life is gone d......... because it just like linking issue . first for sure she will start lie to parent ,2 may start smoking ,3 drunk , 4 the 1 i most worry having sex during drunk than the guy didn't wear condom and she get pregnant and then the guy ignore her and leave it alone . i dont dare to think any more . i crying d............... !_! i dont want to see her become like that . is really sad that , go clubbing to find happiness ad replace the love that left out.


i feel sad , when she crying to protect her mother . i know the family sure got some history behing it . but i dont know what is that just feel that why they doing this to her ? to her family ? i feel hopeless and helpless that time . because she tell me they are christian ???? what that is so so so wrong ???????? why they want to do this ?? why i reallycan feel the pain as well , so that why my tear flowing out . i not dare to tell her i do really care bout her ,even thought i always scold her this and that............ i feel sad to scold her ....... after scold her my self cant sleep .......... but i really never put my self to her shoe that why i will get angry so fast , but now i know abit abit bout her d... i feel last time i really too over d.... she is sad d..... i not giving support but scloding some more . i know scolding is meaning less d...... now just pray god do some thing to the family .


i am so shame being with her 4 year d, now only i feel and know her family problem ya..... may be people will say non of your business what >?? but for me i will do and try every single energy to protect the 1 i love . worst come to worst i dont care d........ i dont care the parent issue d..... i just want her and my family wont happen this type of thing because i know the feeling very well . i am her can say except sex different most of the thing that go thought is same just some i dont know only . her family just like mine last time family. not suitable to talk here . every 1 have they problem and they also must have some 1 to share out . dont care la....... he can help or not at least you will feel much better Rather than cry and screaming to the sea......



thank god again for bring and giving me 1 more chance a life . because my aircraft never after take off only shut down . if that happen good luck for me la................